Mother-in-law, Daughter-in-law, Mentoring: Relationships Can Go Right
Author, Speaker, and Life Coach Deb DeArmond with husband, Ron.Author, Speaker, and Life Coach Deb DeArmond with husband, Ron.

Deb packed this episode with wisdom from her personal experience. Naturally, I want to get a head start. So of course, I asked her really personal questions I’ve wondered about for a long time. 

Starting With a Bang!

We recorded the interview early to begin the new year with a bang. At that time I thought it was a safe topic since my son wasn’t dating anyone. Little did I know. 

On the one hand, I’m pretty sure I’m in the weeds today on ways to embarrass your grown children. On the other hand, we’re virtually guaranteed at least two people will download today’s episode, my son and his girlfriend. Pray for me. Hahaha.

In this episode, Deb offers some no-no’s for both sides of the mother-in-law, daughter-in-law relationship. Plus, shares invaluable insight on creating the right environment for thriving family relationships. Find more Fireside Talk Radio podcasts.

The Testosterone Zone

“Well, I’ll tell you that having three sons and soon to be eight grandsons, I have lived in the testosterone zone,” says Deb with a laugh. “They actually have in some ways helped me understand what my role was going to be.”

She begins by sharing that each of her sons married the right woman.

“I have a red-head, brunette, and blond in the group. They are as different as their hair colors.”

Don’t miss the personal stories Deb shared in last week’s blog: Family Fatigue: Building Back Better Families in 2022 with Deb DeArmond.

Praying Ahead about Mother-in-law, Daughter-in-law

By the time Deb’s sons found their wives, they were well-covered in prayer. 

“Truthfully, it started when our boys were babies. When they were babies, every night, we prayed over them. And we did so until they were toddlers,” she says.

As their boys got older, Deb and her hubby, Ron, continued to pray for each week together. 

Now, do you wonder if you missed your chance to pray for the women your sons marry? Certainly not!

“It’s very much God-driven from the time they were young, but there’s always time to catch up,” says Deb.

Welcome Additions to the Family

Of course, I wanted to compare notes on how Deb and Ron pray.

“We prayed that God would bring them the right women. And that they would recognize those women when they showed up,” she reports, giving specific examples. 

“We prayed for that unknown girl. ‘Father, wherever she is and what ever she’s doing tonight, bless her and keep her safe. And if she doesn’t yet know Jesus, bring people into her path that will show her that way.’”  

Seriously, Deb even went so far as to pray about any “posers” who might show up along the way.

Praying prepared everyone to welcome their daughters-in-law into the family. 

“But I am blessed because I love each of these girls more than I can possibly say.”

Mother-in-law, Daughter-in-law: Off Track?

Of course, every day is a new chance to mess up friendships within our families. Our kids can marry the best people in the whole world, but stuff still pops up. We all get off track. 

In families, things can go sideways quickly. Finances, health, births, deaths, all put pressure on relationships. So how can families keep all their relationships thriving, especially with in-laws?

With humor and insight, Deb gave some great advice on how a mother-in-law can respond well when things get complicated. She says understanding your role is crucial. 

“I have no illusions about who comes first in my boys’ life. After God, it is not me. When God brought a woman to Adam in the garden, it wasn’t his mama.  Okay? That’s a clue.” (For more specifics on coaching your son to handle mother-in-law, daughter-in-law conflicts, click on today’s podcast.) READ THE FULL ARTICLE

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