“Once I say them, you’re going to say, ‘dah,’” she jokes. But, honestly, I learned a ton from this gifted teacher, business consultant, speaker, and trained nurse. 

Toie noticed the five steps underlying all change while she was implementing Lean Six Sigma in multimillion dollar companies overseas. This came after her successful career in the nursing profession; first in patient care, then in health management. 

Hear her thoughts on this topic in her own voice, plus the stories she shared in our interview. (Toie’s story, here. Click here, for more Fireside Talk Radio.)

The Universal Blueprint for Change

In fact, when I joked about Alcoholics Anonymous needing Twelve Steps, she responded by saying even the Twelve Steps break down into her five steps. 

She claims all change breaks down to five steps and names several programs as examples, including Simon Sinok’s Start With Why and Shawn Achor’s The Happiness Advantage. 

“Having five steps takes away some of the scariness of change,” she adds. She sees her five basic steps as the blueprint behind all change.

Ready for Positive Change in Your Life?

Last week, Toie shared about abruptly quitting her job. (You can find that interview, here. For a link to her book, click here.) Her story is very inspiring especially if you think it’s time for a change yourself.

“One of the most important things to remember is our brains naturally resist change, no matter how good or bad it is,” explains Toie, “That fear is our brain’s survival mechanism.” Our brains want to keep us safe and secure, according to Toie, so the first big hurdle is recognizing the fear.  

“Self-doubt sabotages most dreams and goals before they even get off the ground,” she adds. (For easy tips about raising confident girls, click here.)

All positive change involves getting past our own self-sabotage. We have to put aside our natural fear, self-doubt, and self-defense, she says.

Tattoos and Taking a Breath

Two things are true about change based on her years of nursing. 

“First, all tattoos change over time no matter where you put them on your body,” she laughs. “And we all take a first breath and a last breath.” She says what happens between those two breaths counts. (For insight about caregiving for aging parents, click here. For help with caregiving in your home, click here.)

No one’s life should consist of joylessly living paycheck to paycheck.

“When you’re doing the work you’re supposed to be doing and you’re passionate about it, things just fall into place. You can’t explain it,” she laughs.

Five Steps Underlying All Change

Here are Toie’s five steps to leading yourself and others with confidence, courage and grace:

• First, realize that you need or want to make a change. Define the problem and start seeing the possibilities.
• Figure out where you’re starting from. Start from where you are.
• Figure out where you want to go. 
• Figure out how you’re going to get there. What’s the path between where you are and where you want to go.
• Fifth and final step answers an important question. How do you stay there?

Our Overloaded Brains

Modern people take in five times more information than 50 years ago. Virtually every aspect of our lives is a distraction now, according to Toie. (For fun tips on encouraging your children to be flashlight readers, click here.)

“If you think about our poor little brain up there chugging away trying to process all this information,” she laughs. “When we don’t stop to process, all that stuff tends to run around like a squirrel on a wheel.” When we can stop and reflect it gives our brain a chance to process, she adds.

How do I really feel about this? Is this important with me? Is this worth the fight? Do I really want to pick this battle?

“To take the time to dream about what you want to do is a big, big step,” she says. Self-work and reflection are an important part of the equation. Ask yourself, how you want to spend your time, money and energy.

For more on how you can create positive changes in your life, cllick here.

Cathy Krafve, Columnist, Speaker, Blogger, Podcaster, and Christian Writer, invites your stories, ideas, and questions at CathyKrafve.com. Truth with a Texas Twang.